Hi Carl,
Do you mean that when installing EasySocial you want the alerts to be unpublished by default?
Unfortunately, it is impossible to achieve this without modifying the SQL queries in EasySocial's installation files.
You can also unpublish the alerts in EasySocial backend alerts page so that new users that register on the site can have those alerts unpublished by default.

I have alerts turned on by default but when I log in as user they are all turned off. Is there a setting I am missing? I want the user to be prompted to turn them off. So all are turned on.

Hi flyfishergirl,
Is this a newly registered user or old user? Do note that if you change the alerts default options in the Alerts page, current user's alerts setting will not change. It will only affect newly registered users. Previously registered users will have their alerts setting stay the same unless you change them inside their account.
If the issue persists for newly registered users, can you start a new thread with the relevant details so we can investigate this? Thanks.